Like Every Morning
by eclecticdinosaurs
Summary: Every night Derek forgets and nothing matters because Stiles is still with him. Every morning he remembers and nothing matters because Stiles is still gone.


_**I like reviews. Be nice. Be constructive.**_

_**Also, this might hurt. **_

_**I apologize in advance. **_

* * *

It wasn't the first night waking up in a comfortable bed, but it felt like it.

The nightmares never really stopped, but once those stringy arms wrapped around his waist they disappeared. The nightmares faded away for the night like the wounds that covered his body were disappearing with the gentle care of the same hands that chased the ugly memories away.

Derek opened his eyes to make sure Stiles was still in bed with him. He had to make sure everything was real and it wasn't a sick joke the universe was playing on him. He watched as his chest rose softly and his breath escaped his lips. He leaned and gently pressed their lips together. All he needed was a taste. Just to make sure everything was in order. He had a nagging feeling like he needed the reassurance that Stiles was there with him and that everything was okay.

He began counting the younger man's moles. Letting his fingers graze over each one and starting the count again. That's when he saw the blood flash. He jumped slightly, his heart pounding in his chest. He evened out his breathing and tried to shake the bad memory away.

_Memory_. He told himself. _Just a memory._

"I'm sorry."

Stiles looked at him with a sad smile.

"What do you mean?" Derek asked confused, "What are you sorry for?"

"For all of this," Stiles continued. "For leaving."

"Stiles, you didn't leave," Derek shook his head and smiled. "You're right here with me."

He wrapped his hands over the others tightly. "See? We're here right now. You're with me."

Stiles stayed silent, pain and sadness written over his face.

Another flash of red and a growl, his growl, made Derek stop and think. That's when he remembered.

He remembered everything.

* * *

He remembered lying in bed, his head buried in Stiles's neck. He remembered Stiles tracing patterns on his back, both talking about the future. About one day telling Sherriff Stilinski about werewolves and hunters but most importantly about them. About going to college and moving in together. About coming back to Beacon Hills and rebuilding the house. About moving in together and growing old.

The soft thump of Stiles's heart was lulling him to sleep when the phone rang and Scott's panicked voice told them the alphas were back.

In a rush they set out towards the shell of the house where the alpha leader invited him to join his pack. After he declined, the battle began.

Although they were battling alphas, Derek had the upper hand. Apart from his betas, he had a hunter and three witches in his pack.

When Jackson told his best friend about everything, Danny didn't waste a second in joining Lydia and Stiles in learning magic from Deaton.

Blood flew left and right, both packs taking large hits but with the alphas slowly retreating.

"Had enough?" Derek growled.

The last alpha stood gradually, a ragged laugh shook his body. His wound was hardly healing. He was dying and he knew it.

"We said that if you didn't join us, we'd kill you." The alpha said shakily.

"Yeah," Derek smirked. "How that work out?"

The alpha laughed again, he raised a finger and pointed behind Derek, "Rather well I think." He collapsed, a twisted smile plastered on his face.

Derek turned around and knew he'd lost.

His pack was fine. Wounded but alive. They'd survive and any scratches would be gone by morning. Even the humans in the pack would have healed in a week tops.

Not Derek. Derek would never heal.

He cradled a lifeless Stiles in his arms, wiping the blood from the corners of his mouth and whispering sweet nothings in his ear, hoping this was a joke. A sick joke someone was playing on him because it wasn't fair for one person to hurt so much twice in a lifetime.

Only a moment ago they had nothing but time. They had a future were Stiles and Derek belonged to each other and everything lasted forever. And it wasn't fair that Derek had lost that future.

* * *

"It isn't fair," Derek choked out. He knew he sounded like a kid fighting for a toy he couldn't have but he didn't care. "It isn't fair."

"I'm so sorry Derek." Stiles shed tears silently. "I'm sorry I'm making you hurt."

Derek reached for Stiles but his hands met thin air. He knew he was awake and Stiles was gone.

He also knew that when the sun set and he lay in bed, he'd have the dream again only to be left heartbroken in the morning.

Heartbroken, like every morning after Stiles left him behind.


End file.
